Brown Skin Is Beautiful Skin - Makeup and Beauty Blog
2 weeks ago I watched an Oprah episode titled "Children Ashamed of the Way They Look," which also launched a new campaign to promote self-esteem for younger girls, O Girl, O Beautiful.
Oprah's guests — celebs and a few regular people — talked about their experiences with beauty and self-esteem within their various cultures.
The story of 2 of the guests, Tangela and her son Najee, resonated with me, and hither'southward a copy from the Oprah Website:
As a child, Tangela says she was teased and tormented by other African-Americans considering of her night complexion. Then, when she was 19 years one-time, Tangela constitute out she was pregnant with her first child. While most expectant mothers just hope for a salubrious child, Tangela prayed for something more.
"I would simply say to God, 'Please don't brand my son dark. Delight don't make my child dark,'" she says. "I didn't want him to experience what I experienced … being called names, being talked about."
When Tangela'south son, Najee, was born with dark skin, she says her middle ached for his future. "I saw people looking at him every bit if something was wrong with him," she says. "That's the pain that I really felt, more and then than my ain darkness."
When Najee was 5 years old, children started teasing him about his complexion. In kindergarten, he says a female classmate, who was besides African-American, fabricated a hurtful remark that he remembers to this day. "The negative comment was, 'Oh, you're and so blackness," he says.
As Najee grew older, the insults continued. "I've been chosen names like darkie, nighttime chocolate, blackie," he says. "Most of my negative comments practice come from other blacks, and it's extremely painful."
Najee says he tries to hide his deep-seated insecurities from his friends and family by pretending to exist happy. Simply deep down, a lifetime of low cocky-esteem is starting to take a toll on him. "Sometimes I have felt that I didn't even want to be on this earth," he says. "Sometimes I wish that God didn't brand me this fashion."
His mother says her biggest regret is not agreement how much hurting Najee has been feeling over the years. Tangela says she tried asking Najee if anyone teased him, but he never wanted to discuss it.
"I tried to requite him books and encouragement and let him know he was beautiful. He had cute teeth," she says. "It well-nigh didn't matter how much I told him because I didn't know what was going on."
Tangela and Najee'south story made me call up of how peel colour is treated within my civilization. I'm Filipino, and my experience with dark skin color sounds a little like theirs. Well-nigh Filipinos consider lighter brown peel more attractive. If yous're a young Filipino daughter running around exterior you usually have an aunt, grandmother or an older family friend yelling at you to get within "before yous get too dark." And if you do tan somebody is going to make a comment about it; note: it'due south never positive.
My regular skin color is on the darker side, but since I love the sun and existence outdoors, I'yard apt to go even darker with a tan. Several of my close Filipino friends and family constantly comment on the state of my browness: "Karen's as well dark," "Karen, your skin is sooooooo dark," and "Information technology'southward too bad you lot're dark like me." I can't lie — it bothered me for a really long time. I would normally just shrug and effort to say something to play it off like, "Oh, well, what can ya practice?"
Last year a close Filipino friend of twenty years fabricated a comment a few days before my wedding. I don't know if it my was pre-wedding insanity, but I but snapped. I told her very matter of factly that, yes, I was pretty damn dark-brown, merely that's just how I was and that I LOVED MY Pare Color and that Existence DARK WAS THE SHIZZ.
I've decided to celebrate my tan fabulousness merely still get a touch on angry when a friend or loved i makes one of those comments. Instead of shrugging information technology off I've decided to endeavour to engage them (the ones who deserve the fourth dimension) in discussion: Why do you think it's okay to make that comment? Have y'all noticed that I never frown and say "Y'all're so pale"? Did you ever think that repeatedly saying something similar "You're too brown" to another Filipino might exist hurtful?
I know that talking about information technology with my friends and family won't revolutionize negative cultural stereotypes anytime soon, but information technology feels like the right thing to do.
Your friendly neighborhood dazzler addict,
Karen
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